Sunday, April 17, 2011

Why Don't Men write good Love Scenes?

They don't?

No, for the most part, they really don't.

In general, men don't write love scenes that resonate with women because they're wired differently than we are. Men are doers, women are feelers. Men form a task in their minds and set off to accomplish it. Insert tab A into slot B. Repeat for 30 seconds and then pop a beer and turn on sports. For a man, sex (because that's what a love scene is to a man) is a matter of performing the identified steps to get to an end result.

Women...well...we anticipate, we plan, we form expectations, and we savor. A woman sets a scene, brings in all of her senses, and creates an emotional event that may or may not involve the actual act.

We couldn't be more different in the way we approach the same event. Obviously, some women may enjoy a more abrupt, physical style of writing, but for the most part, men who write for women need to get in touch with their emotional side if they want their love scenes to be more generally accepted by the millions of women who savor romantic stories. They must learn to involve all of their senses, create a sensual process rather than a slam, bam, thank you ma'am event, and allow their characters to form a bond, rather than just hook up.

These things will enable the male writer to create a love scene their female readers will not only accept, but will thoroughly enjoy.

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